Black Panties

As some of you may recall, I work at the Starbucks on the campus of Georgia Southern University. My uniform requires that I wear a solid black polo shirt and black or khaki pants. Since I’m weird, I prefer to wear black pants and a black undershirt, and—you guessed it—black panties, to compliment the required black polo.  Now that we’re all up to speed I’d like to explain what prompted me to tell the world about my professionally preferred undergarment color. When I was getting dressed to go to work the first few times, I noticed that I have like no black underwear. This annoyed me because I wanted everything to match, so the next time I went to the store I looked carefully for a pack of like five pairs of regular, boring, cotton, bikini style women’s underwear. After wandering the aisles and lingering amongst the lingerie for way too long, I gave up but I was still hopeful because I figured I could just go to or the pantie maker website and find what I was after with no further problems. However, I was wrong. Apparently they just don’t offer a value pack of just solid black panties. If you look really hard you might find a six-pack with one single pair of solid black panties, but I’d have to buy like thirty pairs of panties to reach my desired goal of owning a grand total of five pairs of solid black panties. I could get lucky and find a value pack with two pairs of the elusive black pantie, but that would be like finding a needle in a Hanes stack (Ah ha ha haaaa! Hooray for puns!). To make matters worse, the solid white underwear commonly referred to as the ‘granny panny’ was everywhere! Multi-pack galore, mocking me. Is it too much to ask to have panties that match my work pants?!? Apparently so.



  1. I’m so glad that someone else shares in the plight of the black panty lol. I really thought I was the only person who went on black panty hunts through Wal-mart. Best thing to do is catch Target when underwear are in sale and by individual pairs…

  2. I love that you wrote about this. I mean, what is UP with that? Why white packs but not black?

  3. It’s so weird, right?! I never noticed it until fairly recently because I’m paranoid that I’ll bend down to grab something out of one of the fridges we have behind the bar at Starbucks, and BAM! everyone standing around gets a free show, lol. I guess I feel like people won’t realize that my panties are showing if they’re the same color as my pants, shirt, and undershirt. But boy was I shocked that Amazon couldn’t solve my predicament. That was the first time amazon ever let me down, EVER. so sad…

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